Patience? What Patience?

Alright, everybody knows that I’m not the most patient person in the world. Between caring for our three children and a grown up Lex, I don’t have a lot of time to spend on anything that needs more than a little knowledge or expertise. Which is why the following happened.

“Amanda! Stop! What are you doing?”

“I’m about to throw this video player out the window, that’s what I’m doing.”

“Honey? Do you want to talk about it?”

“No.”

“That was you I heard cussing up a blue streak, wasn’t it?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” At that, I put the Blue-Ray player back on the entertainment center shelf and plopped down into the desk chair that sat nearby. “You know how you get when you’re cooking?”

Lex looked thoughtful for a moment and then nodded at me. “The cussing?”

“Yeah. Well, I found what makes me curse like a sailor.”

“Sweetheart, what I heard coming from this room would make a sailor blush.”

In spite of my frustration, I had to laugh.

Lex walked over to the entertainment center and picked up the box. Then she sorted through the various cables the electronics store salesman had sent home from me when I told him that I had no idea what he was talking about when he asked me what kind of input and output connections were on our television. “So, maybe we could try installing this thing together?” Lex’s brow furrowed, and she sighed. “I can see your problem right here.”

“You can? What is it?”

“Well, you have too many cables and not enough things to plug them into.”

“Uh, yeah, I knew that already. Which cables go where? That’s’ what I want to know.”

“Hmm…okay, I know what to do now.” Lex looked triumphantly at me and tucked the new player under her arm. She walked over to the window and opened it wide.

You know something? My wife could have been a quarterback. She hurled that DVR right out the window and through the kid’s tire swing. It bounced a few times and then smashed into pieces against the fence.

“Feel better?”

Lex grinned at me and said, “Yes I do. You?”

“I’d say that was one fine throwing arm you have there, honey.”

Then we called Martha and asked her to watch the children. We got into my SUV and headed back to town.  That night, we curled up on the couch together and, with the children stuffing their faces with popcorn, enjoyed a 3D animated movie. No DVR needed. We’d came home with a 3d smart TV with a built in disk player. At least that’s what the salesman said we got as he refunded us the cost of all those cables.

As for me. You turn it on and hit some buttons on the remote control. While I’m confessing things, I might as well add that Lex kept me from hurling the remote control right out of the window when I couldn’t get it to respond to any of the buttons I pushed. She opened it up and said, “Hon, the batteries go this way.”

Amanda.

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